F is for Family is an animated raunchy comedy that takes place in the 1970’s in a suburb of Pittsburgh, Pennsylvania. The show focuses on the Murphy family, firmly middle class, struggling through the hardships of mundane American life. Though the show focuses on all members of the family, one of the most important aspects of the series is the father and son relationship of fourteen-year-old Kevin Murphy and his father, Frank Murphy.
Kevin and Frank’s relationship is coloured by constant argumentation. The pair cannot stop bickering yet to their core, both have a deep desire to be accepted by one another. Kevin adores his father, yet, he is a hormonal and moody teenager, and hence has a tendency to be mouthy. However, it is Frank who has the bigger temper and escalates things nearly every time the pair fight.
Frank’s anger issues and tendency towards combat with his child stem from his fraught relationship in adolescence with his own father. As a child, Frank’s father constantly put him down or hit him. In season four, viewers are given a direct insight into Frank’s childhood. Viewers peer into Frank’s past and watch as his father beats him ruthlessly with a crutch, shoves ice cream into his face, and calls him “Francine,” teasing him that he is more of a woman than a man. Young Frank is shown being forced to walk behind his father’s car, crying, while dressed as a carrot for the school musical (something his father once again teased him for- claiming that he was dressed as an “orange dick”). Frank also recounts how his father forced him to wear a “grass skirt and coconut tits because he cried at Pearl Harbour.” It is evident that Frank endured some form of child abuse, but ironically, Frank is unable to avoid abusive behaviour towards his kids, particularly Kevin. Frank allows his anger over his childhood to make him a slightly less intense mirror to his father.
Frank wants to be a better father than his was, yet remains trapped in a cycle of reenacting nearly identical behaviour of his father’s toward his kids. A prime example of this is how he changes his father’s expression, “I swear to god, so help me, I will put you down a fucking well,” into “I swear to god, so help me, I will put you through this fucking wall.” Furthermore, when Kevin is in his most dire moment, ready to talk to his father about his experience with statutory rape, Frank pushes him aside, failing to hear Kevin out, and focusing on his own struggles instead.
The tragedy of Frank’s behaviour towards Kevin originates from his semi-awareness of his behaviour. He knows that growing up he hated his father and on some subconscious level appears to recognize that while his behaviour towards his children is slightly less intense than his father’s, like his father, he is often a volatile and negative force in his children’s lives. In the second episode of the show, Kevin gets high and relives a moment of his childhood (when he was around two) where his father tells him that they may not get along in the future, but he will always be his father and will always love him. The scene appears touching but cements the idea that from Kevin’s earliest years, Frank has assumed that Kevin will grow to hate him as he hated his father.
In the first episode of the show Kevin yells at his father, “I hate you.” This is act of teen rebellion that Kevin seems to regret as he says it. However, Frank takes it to heart and steps outside. The truth is Kevin does not hate his father, but wishes his father regarded him more kindly. When having his flashback, Kevin proclaims that he is desperate to rekindle the simple happiness he felt with his father when he was a baby. He wants to get on track to be better for his father. He seeks his father’s love and acceptance more than anything.
F is for Family is an important show in demonstrating the fragility of family and the humanity behind each member of a familial structure. Kevin’s behaviour is fairly standard for a teen but is often misinterpreted by his father as vindictive. While Kevin may not be a very obedient son, he is a vulnerable and caring person who is scarcely ever given the validation he desperately needs. Instead, Frank, damaged from his own parental relationship, pushes his son away by demonising him instead of loving him and “holding his hand” to help him grow. Frank is a father, and children often look toward their parents, assuming they know the “correct” path of action. However, Frank is too self-absorbed to understand Kevin nor nurture him. While Frank loves Kevin, he is a damaged individual who doesn’t know how to treat Kevin in the manner Kevin needs.
