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Alt-J’s new album REDUXER, a series of hip hop remixes of their last album RELAXER, is tacky. A sleek-bodied trinket of a thing, pandering to well-produced pop trends (expect thumping 808s, and quantiticised drum loops) with a star-studded feature list, for track after track of spark but no flame. It is novelty, characterless and monotone. In short, it is a vibe.

We begin with the meandering ‘3WW’, boasting a disinterested Little Simz mourning the lack of grey in her rainbow. Say what you want about her wonky ruminations on spirituality, but she certainly inhabits the beat, which is… well, quite grey. The “neon” pined for by lead singer Joe Newman does not evoke the country setting he claims to have found it among, but rather the derelict business districts of our cities, made way for by demolishing the character that accrues with history.

‘In Cold Blood’ is excruciatingly bad (both times it appears on this record) with a phoned in verse from Pusha T, fresh from his clout filled Summer, he’s decided to trade it in for “real time foreign cars… yacht parties, jet skis” here; which I might have forgiven given a flash beat! As for the beat – do you remember offbeat New Zealand folk duo Flight of the Conchords’ awkward and hilarious appeal to Daft Punk fans with ‘Robots’? Well, someone seems to have missed the joke and lifted the Conchords’ binary solo for the hook here. Feelings of mild despair and irony invoked by the sonic landscape persist throughout the record.

The next track is a reworking of alt-J’s own reworking of ‘House of the Rising Sun’ by The Animals. A cover of a cover, it works less like a respectful nod back to what I would consider a more inventive era in rock and roll’s history but more as an unprovoked licking of a fist upon the history’s dome – and we’re only three tracks in!

Offensively dialled in performances from Danny Brown, Terrence Martin and Goldlink crop up throughout the run time of REDUXER, to further make me recoil into my armchair. It’s like I’ve binged on the auditory equivalent of Sunday morning’s soaps omnibus. I am confused as to the nature of art itself. Is this what music sounds like?

Then suddenly, there’s a ray of hope. The Rejjie Snow ‘Hit Me Like That Snare’ is pretty enjoyable and fits the smooth young trap-rapper’s buttery albeit unremarkable delivery down to the ground. It isn’t groundbreaking, but it’s pleasant – which is more than I can say for the rest of the record. You might even think “things aren’t that bad” after listening.

We must travel far beyond REDUXER’s silicone clutches, though, to find the lively music, the music that fills gaffs and breathes life into our world and gives hope to us in our day to day. Although it is desperately hollow music, REDUXER might be, to its credit, somewhat life affirming. I know I’m going out crate digging afterward. Break the vibe. Bring life back to music!